Single Life

I grew up in an ol’ school Black church. There were church mothers with peppermints in their purses, men with shiny shoes and cufflinks, and morning services that lasted way too long. Outside of church, women wore the obligatory blue jean skirt down to their ankles and paired it with simple, flat white tennis shoes and a basic t-shirt. These…

The holiday season has a certain scent to it. You can smell the decorative butter cookies, peppermint candy canes and schnitzel with noodles (btw- I Googled that and turns out its chicken fried steak and pasta. Who knew?) Let’s not forget the eggnog lattes at Starbucks, work holiday parties and neighborhood homes lit up with (tasteful or not-so-tasteful) holiday decorations.…

It was 2012. I had just moved to the Bay Area from Los Angeles to start a new chapter in my life. I was sitting in the front room of my new apartment and just finished a phone call that left me feeling a bit frustrated and discouraged. Little did I know, that one phone call was the start of…

Welp. Here we go again. I know what this is. I wasn’t expecting it so soon. Dang homie. I have gone another year without a real date. Shocker, right? Not really. I’ve been through this before. (Remember my two-year period with no date, no kiss, no nothing?). While I don’t prefer these moments, it is what it is. I’ve surrendered…

I was scrolling through social media when I should have been somewhere writing. I knew I had no business being on there because, in a matter of minutes, I saw at least six announcements about wedding engagements. Six! I saw acquaintances from high school getting engaged, with kids in tow. I saw people I knew from church get engaged. I…

Dating presents more conundrums than I think I was mentally prepared for. Top of mind is splitting the bill when out on a date. What are the rules? What’s the protocol? Is “going-dutch” still a thing? I get a different response from every woman or man I speak with. I’ve noticed a large spectrum based on age, region and even…

I sat at a round table covered with a lavender tablecloth and decorated with a simple flower centerpiece. Six other women sat with me and we were preparing to share our prayer requests. Spring was in full bloom so the days were longer and the weather warmer. For the past four weeks, we met every Tuesday evening for a six-week…

It’s February and a lot of people are looking for love. This also means a lot of people are probably getting ghosted. Ouch, I know. For those unaware of the conundrum that is ghosting, good ol’ Google defines it as the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication. That means no…

Years ago, I had unknowingly placed a limit on my travel experience potential based on my relationship status. I told myself and others that I was going to wait until I was married to travel overseas. I was “saving” bigger travel expeditions as an opportunity to make memories with my future husband. While this may have seemed like a noble,…

My book club is reading Waiting to Exhale for our January meeting. It’s a busy month with birthdays, work holiday parties, Christmas and New Year’s so many of us don’t have time to read a deep, long novel. We wanted to keep things light and continue the discussion around how black women are the greatest beings in the world. I…